today during youth service, we had another short discussion on peer networking. i didnt think our grp discussion would last for 45mins, perhaps let alone 30mins, but it almost extended to an hour. thank God i have peers who are truly concerned about one another. for most of the time, in fact almost the entire time, i wasnt really talking. one thing kept surfacing in my mind as reasons upon reasons of absence are thrown onto the floor:
is it really that hard to keep the faith as a youth in tjc?
followed by my next concern:
what about the future generations to come? will history repeat itself or will the situation aggravate further as the world starts to revolve around a different axis?
and finally, the dreaded question which i dare not answer but know i have to in time to come:
what am I gonna do about it?
But He knows the way that I take; When He has tested me, I shall come forth as gold.
Monday, 9 May 2011
Monday, 2 May 2011
90-92
thank God that the 90-92 reunion/fellowship has finally materialised today on a public holiday and i can make it for this event. though not every1 who fit in the age group was around, yet it was a really nice feeling to be together with brothers and sisters of 'my batch'. in fact, in the past the only times that we were together were during church camps and theolo, with the last 1 ending 3 years ago. though it is less than a handful of years, yet to me it feels so distant as if time has flown by so quickly. everyone has truly grown up. gone were those chubby faces or thin figures or bad hairdos and many other peculiar appearances. here before me were graduating poly students, soldiers, and to be varsity students.
yet, amongst the people there or those who were supposed to be there but couldnt make it, there is a small number that is/would no longer be there. these are the people who have possibly strayed away from the faith. would they return back to the fold or not? i do not know, but it is after all our duty and responsibility to pray for them and guide them back to the fold. you see, the thing about being a photographer is that you have many photos with many different faces from the past. and that is what saddens me when i see a familiar face whom i no longer see in the church.
is this path to the heavenly kingdom really that hard to walk and is worth considering to give up for? in the past, i would never have taken all these things so seriously. just go with the flow on mondays to fridays, spent time wisely on church on saturday and maybe sunday mornings with God and close brethren, and sign up for any spiritual meetings, church outings, bible camps or theolos without hestitation. why would i ever want to leave this wonderful lifestyle filled with many close family members around me including my heavenly Father? in fact, everyone else wouldnt too. yet, it seems that life is more complicated than it seems. brothers and sisters start becoming inactive in church as other commitments and responsibilities in life start to creep in. if its momentarily than i guess it shouldnt be much of a problem. until one dissapears from the radar after a few years and becomes reluctant to return to church. such is the fact of the matter which plagues every tjc all over the world. and this is now something which i can feel the weight or burden resting on my back as i look at myself and look around me in the short and long term.
yet, amongst the people there or those who were supposed to be there but couldnt make it, there is a small number that is/would no longer be there. these are the people who have possibly strayed away from the faith. would they return back to the fold or not? i do not know, but it is after all our duty and responsibility to pray for them and guide them back to the fold. you see, the thing about being a photographer is that you have many photos with many different faces from the past. and that is what saddens me when i see a familiar face whom i no longer see in the church.
is this path to the heavenly kingdom really that hard to walk and is worth considering to give up for? in the past, i would never have taken all these things so seriously. just go with the flow on mondays to fridays, spent time wisely on church on saturday and maybe sunday mornings with God and close brethren, and sign up for any spiritual meetings, church outings, bible camps or theolos without hestitation. why would i ever want to leave this wonderful lifestyle filled with many close family members around me including my heavenly Father? in fact, everyone else wouldnt too. yet, it seems that life is more complicated than it seems. brothers and sisters start becoming inactive in church as other commitments and responsibilities in life start to creep in. if its momentarily than i guess it shouldnt be much of a problem. until one dissapears from the radar after a few years and becomes reluctant to return to church. such is the fact of the matter which plagues every tjc all over the world. and this is now something which i can feel the weight or burden resting on my back as i look at myself and look around me in the short and long term.
Sunday, 3 April 2011
moved
it was a wednesday, just a few days back. was let out for a couple of hours and had the opportunity to go to church for evening service. whilst i was wondering around after dinner and idling on the bus on my way to adam road, many things went through my mind. sad, lonely things. dismal thoughts clouding my mind as i looked back and pondered on the purpose of my life in this 8 months remaining of my imprisonment. since my eta was around 20mins b4 hymn singing, i resolved in my heart to seek the Lord in prayer for relief from this mental strain and burden. and so i found a quiet spot and started praying. many things poured out from within as i conversed, or rather, lamented on my plight and situation across the spiritual channel to the otherworldly Recipient. some time passed, and the ranting nonetheless continued. i felt useless really, as at the back of my mind i truly felt that i was the worst of all christians in church. and then my hands ran out of strength. they felt so heavy and tired that i could not but let them drop towards the ground as i continued in spiritual tongues. it was then that while my eyes were closed, i thought i noticed a shadow with a pair of legs passing by in front of me from my left to right. another brethren who was here to join me in prayer perhaps? yet it was not so. in an instant, i felt tears welling up within the recesses of my eyes before peeking through and enveloping my pupils. somehow i knew that it wasnt those typical tears of sadness or agony or grief that so commonly associates us human with. after all, i was completely aware of my own emotions. how can i cry so suddenly and not know what led to it? soon after, my arms regained their strength and i lifted them up, clenching tightly, as i continued in prayer with renewed conviction. and so i came to 1 conclusion. it was the Spirit of God that had moved me. when i was at my weakest and loneliest, Jesus came to let me know that he knows.
Monday, 7 March 2011
ysm 11
overdued, but a post nonetheless. thank God i could spend an entire weekend in church for the youth spiritual meeting without r-mi intruding into those precious few days. though, i feel that it was a little too short and somehow not as filled as i expected it to be. still, it was good seeing and interacting with brothers and sisters from tk and semb, a great time for reunion and fellowship. had the pleasant opportunity to take photos of the event (again) and took a great group photo on the last day, though i think i could have taken better photos of the various activities if i were not too preoccupied with taking videos, a new area that im attempting to venture into with little success. nevertheless, i thank God for giving me the opportunity to do what i like in church. hope that all of us youths would strive and continue to seek roots, grow roots and take root in this passing journey of ours.
one particular activity that got me into my introverted, feverishly thinking mode was peer networking, where youths belonging to their own age groups gathered together to discuss about those other lost sheeps that were not there or no longer there. ran around taking a couple of photos before returning to my group, where i found them brainstorming about how to reintroduce themselves to select individuals and bring them back into the fold. however, i wasnt really paying too much attention. somehow, being idealistic isnt really my cup of tea. i was actually focusing on all of us who were sitting around me. what if 10, 5, or even 3 years down the road, one of us goes missing?
i am one who upholds the belief that people change, for better or for worst, as time goes by. especially in this period of adolescence where the environment around us is ever-fluctuating and we strive to adapt to these surroundings by changing ourselves (since most of the time we cant do the other). i have heard of numerous stories of how brothers and sisters who used to be so fervent and so strong in the faith leaving the church. i cant remember what reasons they have for doing so. frankly, i dont really care. but just like that, gone. trashing away this amazing grace of God for worldly gratification. throwing away eternity for a moments folly or impulse. just like that.
now lets not be hypocritical and merely talk about others. what about myself? what if one day, i too would come upon a mid-life crisis in my faith? would i even feel regretful and sorrowful if i chose the wide path to destruction, or would i not even feel the pinch at all? life is unpredictable. u see how people can have a 180degree turn in their life and become so saintly. and the other is also so true and so real.
the bible says that not everyone who says Lord, Lord can enter the kingdom of heaven.
what is the real motivation or driving force that is pushing me to keep on track on this burdensome and fiery path that a child of God must go through? is it really the love for God that compels me to remain faithful on this journey along the wilderness? or merely my mind deceiving me by gratifying desires or gaining achievements under hidden layers through various means within the church?
am I who i profess myself to be?
may the spirit of power, love and of a sound mind help me to find the answer before its too late.
one particular activity that got me into my introverted, feverishly thinking mode was peer networking, where youths belonging to their own age groups gathered together to discuss about those other lost sheeps that were not there or no longer there. ran around taking a couple of photos before returning to my group, where i found them brainstorming about how to reintroduce themselves to select individuals and bring them back into the fold. however, i wasnt really paying too much attention. somehow, being idealistic isnt really my cup of tea. i was actually focusing on all of us who were sitting around me. what if 10, 5, or even 3 years down the road, one of us goes missing?
i am one who upholds the belief that people change, for better or for worst, as time goes by. especially in this period of adolescence where the environment around us is ever-fluctuating and we strive to adapt to these surroundings by changing ourselves (since most of the time we cant do the other). i have heard of numerous stories of how brothers and sisters who used to be so fervent and so strong in the faith leaving the church. i cant remember what reasons they have for doing so. frankly, i dont really care. but just like that, gone. trashing away this amazing grace of God for worldly gratification. throwing away eternity for a moments folly or impulse. just like that.
now lets not be hypocritical and merely talk about others. what about myself? what if one day, i too would come upon a mid-life crisis in my faith? would i even feel regretful and sorrowful if i chose the wide path to destruction, or would i not even feel the pinch at all? life is unpredictable. u see how people can have a 180degree turn in their life and become so saintly. and the other is also so true and so real.
the bible says that not everyone who says Lord, Lord can enter the kingdom of heaven.
what is the real motivation or driving force that is pushing me to keep on track on this burdensome and fiery path that a child of God must go through? is it really the love for God that compels me to remain faithful on this journey along the wilderness? or merely my mind deceiving me by gratifying desires or gaining achievements under hidden layers through various means within the church?
am I who i profess myself to be?
may the spirit of power, love and of a sound mind help me to find the answer before its too late.
Sunday, 23 January 2011
the king is coming
is the theme for this quarter's youth service.
listened to a really interesting sermon today pertaining to the Day of the Lord with biblical references from both the old testament, namely from certain prophetic books, and new testament concerning the signs of that Day. how utter darkness, utter destruction, utter judgement and utter fear will come upon the age of man when it is at its end. most importantly, a question to ask ourselves: is the coming of the Day of the Lord secondary/peripheral to all our worldly activities in our everyday lives that we lead in carousing, revelry and fulfillment of the flesh? or are we working out our salvation with fear and trembling and equipping our hearts and souls for that fearful Day when the door of grace will finally be shut? a most pertinent question indeed. yet, the greatest irony is that as the Day draws ever closer with the passing of each year, it is conversely getting further away, growing distant or even diminishing into a mere hearsay in man's perspective.
some people say that having too much negative thoughts is bad. but sometimes i do think about death. what if my soul is required of me in the coming week during one of my routine pt sessions, or perhaps while crossing the road with my right of way on bookout day? can i really lift my head up boldly and face Him who seats on His throne of judgement? even if i have already received the Holy Spirit, do i really deserve to enter the mansions of rest?
living for Christ is like going on a route march without knowing where the end point is or the distance you are supposed to much. the more you travel, the heavier the burden on your back becomes with the straps starting to pierce through your shoulders and the more disorientated you get as the fatigue level starts to rise. will we give up, or persevere? knowing that a ceremony lies at the end-point waiting to commemorate those who have completed this gruelling test of the body, mind, and spirit.
the King is coming; is He coming for me?
listened to a really interesting sermon today pertaining to the Day of the Lord with biblical references from both the old testament, namely from certain prophetic books, and new testament concerning the signs of that Day. how utter darkness, utter destruction, utter judgement and utter fear will come upon the age of man when it is at its end. most importantly, a question to ask ourselves: is the coming of the Day of the Lord secondary/peripheral to all our worldly activities in our everyday lives that we lead in carousing, revelry and fulfillment of the flesh? or are we working out our salvation with fear and trembling and equipping our hearts and souls for that fearful Day when the door of grace will finally be shut? a most pertinent question indeed. yet, the greatest irony is that as the Day draws ever closer with the passing of each year, it is conversely getting further away, growing distant or even diminishing into a mere hearsay in man's perspective.
some people say that having too much negative thoughts is bad. but sometimes i do think about death. what if my soul is required of me in the coming week during one of my routine pt sessions, or perhaps while crossing the road with my right of way on bookout day? can i really lift my head up boldly and face Him who seats on His throne of judgement? even if i have already received the Holy Spirit, do i really deserve to enter the mansions of rest?
living for Christ is like going on a route march without knowing where the end point is or the distance you are supposed to much. the more you travel, the heavier the burden on your back becomes with the straps starting to pierce through your shoulders and the more disorientated you get as the fatigue level starts to rise. will we give up, or persevere? knowing that a ceremony lies at the end-point waiting to commemorate those who have completed this gruelling test of the body, mind, and spirit.
the King is coming; is He coming for me?
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)