moved

it was a wednesday, just a few days back. was let out for a couple of hours and had the opportunity to go to church for evening service. whilst i was wondering around after dinner and idling on the bus on my way to adam road, many things went through my mind. sad, lonely things. dismal thoughts clouding my mind as i looked back and pondered on the purpose of my life in this 8 months remaining of my imprisonment. since my eta was around 20mins b4 hymn singing, i resolved in my heart to seek the Lord in prayer for relief from this mental strain and burden. and so i found a quiet spot and started praying. many things poured out from within as i conversed, or rather, lamented on my plight and situation across the spiritual channel to the otherworldly Recipient. some time passed, and the ranting nonetheless continued. i felt useless really, as at the back of my mind i truly felt that i was the worst of all christians in church. and then my hands ran out of strength. they felt so heavy and tired that i could not but let them drop towards the ground as i continued in spiritual tongues. it was then that while my eyes were closed, i thought i noticed a shadow with a pair of legs passing by in front of me from my left to right. another brethren who was here to join me in prayer perhaps? yet it was not so. in an instant, i felt tears welling up within the recesses of my eyes before peeking through and enveloping my pupils. somehow i knew that it wasnt those typical tears of sadness or agony or grief that so commonly associates us human with. after all, i was completely aware of my own emotions. how can i cry so suddenly and not know what led to it? soon after, my arms regained their strength and i lifted them up, clenching tightly, as i continued in prayer with renewed conviction. and so i came to 1 conclusion. it was the Spirit of God that had moved me. when i was at my weakest and loneliest, Jesus came to let me know that he knows.